In anticipation of Valentine’s Day, Eddie and I were interviewed by Agmes, one of my favorite jewelry lines, for their ‘Radical Love’ campaign. I’m so honored we were chosen for this feature and given the opportunity to answer questions about what love means to us, how it presents itself in our lives, and how it is expressed in our relationships. Plus we got to show how we styled some of their signature pieces.
RADICAL LOVE
AGMES: WHAT IS RADICAL LOVE TO YOU?
SISSY: To me radical love means completely surrendering to something with a devotion that deepens and expands in every moment and an intention that sparks light, joy and wholeness in every direction.
EDDIE I would say absolutely 100% unconditional love and support throughout all chapters of your journey together is radical love to me.
DESCRIBE YOUR LOVE
SISSY I’d say we celebrate our love all day every day like it’s the air we breathe. Our approach to a loving relationship is pretty much second nature now. We intend to have a long, happy healthy life together forever. We only behave in ways toward one another that ensure this - with kindness.
HOW IS YOUR NOTION OF LOVE DIFFERENT TO "NORMAL EXPECTATIONS" OF LOVE?
SISSY I hardly know what the normal expectation of love is anymore. I feel like so much of what is called love is conditional love. Is that really love? Dedication , devotion, duty, support, kindness, aligned goals, companionship, communication, respect, yes. We have all of those 1000 percent. I think our love is different in that we have that 1000 percent - to the point we can also give one another ample freedom to continue to grow and explore as individuals while upholding our union as the priority. Since we have been ethically non-monogamous on and off for 18 years, I think the freedom we give one another would have some clutching their pearls. And we have a closeness that would have some shaking their heads.
HOW DO YOU CELEBRATE YOUR LOVE?
SISSY We are best friends. We spend nearly every second together when possible because we really enjoy being around each other all the time. Just going out for coffee is a celebration of our love. Seeing each other grow and succeed and experience joy is a celebration. Being there to support each other is a celebration. We also travel to celebrate but we say “we’re the ace card” - we can go high or low. A trip to Florence Italy or doom scrolling next to each other at a coffee shop in Echo Park, it’s all as joyful as a rom com musical hat montage for us.
HOW DO YOU SHOW OTHERS YOU LOVE THEM?
SISSY I’m bad at this. Unless I feel completely safe, I tend to withhold showing love. I think it’s good that I’m working on being more vulnerable, leaning into feeling unsafe so I can heal , find my own footing, and be capable of receiving love and giving love more fearlessly and unconditionally.
HOW HAS YOUR PERSPECTIVE OF THE MEANING OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP CHANGED OVER TIME?
SISSY I no longer care to enforce my will or impose my views on others. I think being more accepting of other people’s lifestyles and points of view is loving. If that gives me the clarity to see when someone is actually self destructive then I could step up and help them if I can. If they would even want or accept my help. I think that’s the case with family. Similarly, in romantic love, giving your partner a lot of freedom to express and explore and just be a rock for them is also loving.
EDDIE When I was younger I didn't know myself well to be myself. You can't communicate a truth when you don't know what your truth is. As I've aged I've become more fearless. I'm no longer apologetic for my needs so it's easier to communicate everything that I am to my partner.
HOW DO YOU CULTIVATE LOVE FOR YOURSELF THROUGH CREATIVE OUTLETS?
SISSY By listening to my intuition and trusting the universe when I feel a calling to pursue something that will align with my spirit and hopefully will be helpful or inspiring to others . And by letting go of things I’ve outgrown, admitting when something is no longer right for me, and reflecting what I could have done better. And doing better next time.
I think writing the newsletter on Substack has evolved into a labor of love . What started with the intention of monetizing by making “passive income” (which I’ve said is about as passive as a Rube Goldberg machine) has become a space for what a friend described as “radical vulnerability”. There is no goal I’m trying to reach other than a form of self expression that feels more honest. Something I can approach with less desperation than making image-based or shopping-based content. It feels like I’m being reborn in a way, like I’m disappearing in a way that feels like a relief and staring new in a purer form. I feel it’s out of love to readers who might need to hear about my experiences with my career, emotional health, feelings around aging and my marriage as well as topics around clothing, shopping and personal style. And to have the support of a love who champions any new medium through which I will become a more honest version of myself and any new endeavor that lights me up inside is everything.
Also check out a styling trick I came up with for this necklace in this Reel.
Fun Fact: This Valentine’s Day will be our 18 year wedding anniversary. It’s been pure bliss.
Enchanting and deeply relatable.